It requires a village. . Growing up I remember running around with my “village” but I don’t recall my parents relying on the “village” as far as I rely on mine.
I’m lucky to live in a locality with neighbors who socialize, children play in the front lawns and where most children go to the local, public college. My family moved to our present house 9 years ago when my daughter was 1 and what we did not see is that we had a “village” to live life with children. Our village started to grow without us realizing it.
As most of us know, as you get older, friends become more difficult to make. Friends begin being made by conditions. By way of instance, you live on the same road, you fall off at daycare the exact same time every day or you work in adjoining cubes. From the time our eldest daughter ended Kindergarten, we had a net of friends whom I could call when I had to. I was a working mother and sometimes I felt like I was constantly asking people for favors. What I heard from people who had older children and were not new to the village was “it all evens out.” I am a firm believer that it will and now I have a 7 and 10 year old and not working full time, I tend to be someone my village stinks on.
Parents need to remember they can not do everything. You will need to surround yourself with those who help you. This is hard for a lot of us but you can not be the football coach, class parent, Boy Scout leader, softball team parent, and social planner. Based on what is happening in your life, you might rely on your village otherwise throughout the year.
Recently I had one of these days – we all have them and we are not proud. I alternated between wanting to shout and shout. I didn’t understand what I wanted but what I got was a hug, a college pick-up, a grocery run and a Pinkberry, Raccoon removal, all from different people in my village. The actions themselves may not look like much but it was what I wanted – support. Support is what I rely in my village for, a few days more than others. I may not need my village now but who knows what tomorrow holds.
How can you rely on your own village?